Lately I have come to realise that questions are really powerful. The right questions, when asked in the right context, can reveal wise insights and propel our learning to a whole new level. Asking the right questions does not always come naturally, but when done right it can create meaningful connections with a friend, sieve out misconceptions in a classroom, or even help us zoom in to what truly matters in difficult conversations.
When we ask people about their definitions of success, there will no doubt be many different kinds of answers. What this question seeks to reveal are usually some of the life priorities and values of those who are answering. In this day and age, a large part of society still associates success with any or all of the following: wealth, fame, prestige or status. While there is nothing inherently wrong with all these, many see them as all or nothing, and feel that they can't measure up if they fail to achieve them.
As I was reading through some of my older blog posts, it occurred to me that I have actually written about what is success before. One and half years later, I still like the definition of success shared by Andrew Halim in his book Balance. If I were to summarise his 4 points needed for success, it would probably look something like this: having enough money to choose to do purposeful work I enjoy, but not at the expense of my mental or physical health. At the same time, I also have enough time to continue to build and sustain meaningful relationships with family and close friends.
At the 2003 Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting, a 13 year old asked Warren Buffett about his definition of success, which is also something I mentioned in my earlier blog post. The original footage with Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger's expanded answers is definitely something worth watching as they cut straight into what truly matters in life. There was a mention of how the only way to love is to be lovable, but the nice thing is that you always get back more than you give away. This article also builds on that sharing and suggests some pointers for how we can follow Buffett's principle of success.
To end off, I would like to share the following quote from Clayton Christensen's book How Will You Measure Your Life?, which is a book that I highly recommend to everyone:
The only metrics that will truly matter to my life are the individuals whom I have been able to help, one by one, to become better people.
I suppose this is the reason why I am quite certain that purposeful work for me will always involve some form of helping others, whether in their personal lives or helping them to acquire certain knowledge or skillsets to lead better lives and bring them closer to their life goals.
No matter what form of success you are seeking out, ask yourself from time to time if it is bringing you one step closer to the person you want to become. The last thing you want to do is to work hard, make lots of sacrifices, but realise in the end that you were moving in the wrong direction.
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