Beyond the Numbers: Quiet Lessons from H1 2025

It's been awhile since I last posted here. I entered 2025 with a newfound freedom: no longer having to wake up to a fulltime job. It was both exhilarating and scary at the same time, as it always is when we embrace uncertainty. In the past 6 months, so much transpired and I had several opportunities to reflect on life and what it means to live with just enough. Rereading some parts of Repacking Your Bags also helped me to refocus on things that truly matter. I am grateful for new friends, continued meetups with old friends and opening myself up to new experiences as well as learning new things. As I take time to reflect, here are 5 lessons that made the most impact on me.

1) Independence has to be paired with purpose

Gaining time freedom is exciting at the start - you can wake up whenever you want and plan out your day however you want. In the past 6 months, I did quite a number of impromptu lunch meetups and could basically park myself at cafes to read from 2pm - 4pm on weekdays, avoiding the lunch crowd and still heading home just before rush hour to avoid the mad squeeze in the trains. However, after awhile I found that I needed some kind of purpose in my life. And this does not necessarily have to be something big, which we usually associate with the word 'purpose'. So for me I asked myself what was important to me during this career break that I wanted to preserve and came up with 3 things:

A. Keep in touch with friends Upon reflection, this was crucial to the Relator in me, and I value relationships and going deeper in conversation with close friends. The newfound time and energy that I had allowed me to schedule catchups with friends both old and new, even though I was also mindful to guard my rest by not over-scheduling in any one week. B. Figure out how much was enough This relates more to the financial side of things. I wanted to have a rough idea of how much my rich life would cost annually. There are a few things that I really enjoy: travel, food and books. I also want to be able to be a blessing by paying for my friends' meals and buying them gifts that they need from time to time. Being able to spend on these few areas would bring me lots of joy, and I am ok to cut down mercilessly on the other stuff. As I pass the midpoint of 2025, tracking my expenses so far has allowed me to get a glimpse of how much I would need. Surprisingly, it is a very reasonable amount. C. Try out new experiences I recently attended an event where Christopher Tan shared about the true meaning of ikigai and it really provided lots of food for thought. One of the things he shared was the importance of having growth and change in our lives, as we tend to avoid stagnation. I am glad that I leaned in to my curiosities and explored various new stuff, from taking up a writing course, getting involved in a mentoring program with MYMCA, to experiencing my first ever filming session.

2) Life is not a competition The education system here in Singapore instills a competitive mindset in us from young. We have to compete to get good grades, so that we can get into a good school, and eventually compete for the best jobs. Competition in itself can build perseverance and resilience, and those are important qualities to have. But what we fail to realise is that beyond school, what each of us values and want may look very different from the person next to us. If we compete mindlessly without stopping to think if that is truly the direction we want to be headed in, we might arrive at the destination faced with a rude shock.

3) Compounding does not just work in the financial markets Most of us are familiar with the concept of compounding our wealth, but do you know that compounding also works in other areas of your life that you invest in? Relationships and health - these two big areas that greatly boost our fulfilment and happiness - investments in them can also be compounded over time. Even as we are busy with work and life, do not neglect friendships. I know of people who regretted working too much and too hard earlier on in life and are now finding it difficult to reconnect with friends. Time that is lost cannot be bought back, so think deeply about which friendships you cherish and put in the hard work to keep in touch. Similarly for health, we have to think about what we still want to be able to do at 80 and then work backwards to see what kind of exercises we have to do today to make that future a reality.

4) Seek self-understanding and communicate better to those that matter

When there is a lot of time for thinking and reflection, we are able to dig deeper into our actions and motivations. Sometimes we find stuff that surprises us, or perhaps we are appalled that our true self is uglier than we would like to admit. In any case, it takes courage to be real and even more courage to communicate our needs to our loved ones. However, when we choose to be vulnerable, we build real and lasting connections. Every single one of us desires to be known, seen, and understood - so choosing vulnerability is part of this process. While it may feel scary at first, the more we do it (with the right people who reciprocate), we will encounter a deep sense of freedom and connection.

5) Define your own success This is a deeply personal exercise as success means different things to different people. For myself, this is still something that I continue to refine as time passes. Currently, success to me is having meaningful relationships and having the time and health to do the things that I enjoy - traveling, reading in a nice, quaint cafe, supporting a friend at a local event. Your definition of success will no doubt look very different from mine, but it doesn't matter. What matters is that you take time to clarify how success looks like for you, and then ask yourself what is the next step you can take to move one step closer to it.

With that, I have come to the end of my musings. Grateful that I made it to the second half of 2025 in relatively good health and have good friends who continue to encourage me in this season of exploration. I may not know what the future holds but I know Who holds the future, and I am ever grateful to God and my faith for keeping and protecting me thus far :)